I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to believe that
if I do not have hair, that people will find me ugly and will reject me,
wherein I would feel bad/depressed about myself because of the accepted and
allowed relationship with others, within which I have programmed myself to be
defined by what others think of me, rather than realising that who I am is not
to be influenced/defined by another's perspective of me, but that within the
principle of oneness and equality as who I really am, that I am the
self-directive principle of me in my world, whereas I direct me within my world
within self-honesty, from within which I do not accept and allow myself to be
defined/influenced by what others think of me - within this, I forgive myself
that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel bad/depressed when another
judges me as being ugly and thus rejects me, instead of realising that it is me
who judges and rejects me through my acceptances and allowances in regards to
the power/influence that another has upon me instead of releasing that power
and giving it back to myself within self-investigation through the tools of
writing, self-forgiveness, self-honesty and self-corrective application.
I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself to be the
self-directive principle of me in my world, through me being influenced by what
others think of me, instead of realising that what I allow within myself when
another judges me is my own reactions as judgments/spite/blame that I hold
against myself - within this, I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed
myself to react within myself when another judges me - within which the
reaction only shows me that I am still judging me as being "inferior"
to another, thus still participating within the games of the mind as polarity,
instead of releasing myself from this game of the mind from within which I do
not want to engage any more, through the tools of writing, self-forgiveness,
self-honesty and self-corrective application.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear what
others will think of me if I am to be seen without my hat, wherein I would fear
others judging me as being "less than them" because of apparently being
perceived as being "ugly" without my hat - within this, I forgive
myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define myself as being ugly
without my hat, thus perceiving myself as being "less than another"
because of the values that I still have regarding my physical appearance as the
picture presentation of myself that I project unto others.
I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself to realise
that through me perceiving myself as being "less than another"
because of not having or losing my hair, that I show myself that I still
participate within the polarities of the mind that I no longer want to engage
in - within which I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself
to realise that through me accepting and allowing myself to participate within
"superiority", that I immidietaly invite the opposite polarity of
"inferiority" within me, thus generating a battle within me between
the two polarities of "superiority" and "inferiority" from
within which I would do all in my power to supress the polarity of
"inferiority", not realising that the more that I supress the feeling
of "inferiority" within me, the more I give power and control to
those who want to control me - within this, I forgive myself that I haven't
accepted and allowed myself to realise that through me allowing myself to
participate within games of polarities of the mind, such as superiority and
inferiority, that I become a puppet which can easily be manipulated by the
elite/those who are in power in order to be controlled.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that
no one would want to be with my company if I do not have hair any longer,
because of the imprinted impression that I programmed into my being from within
my teenage years, where I would deliberately think, over and over and over
again, that I would rather be dead than not having any more hair, because of
the fear that I had of showing myself without hair to cover the big forehead
that I have.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that
the "big" forehead that I have is to be forever hidden from the
sights of another, because of the stigma that have been imprinted within me
from my formative years, where I was regularly teased, ridiculed and rejected
because of being judged as being "less than the cool ones" because of
my physical appearance - within this, I forgive myself that I haven't accepted
and allowed myself to love me for who I am as an unconditionnal expression of
myself as life, instead of seeking to "love me" according to the
limited conditions of what "love" is culturally defined as, such as
the conditions of being loved only if physically attractive to the opposite
sex.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define the
love I have of myself through the interactions that I have with the opposite
sex, wherein I would define myself as being loved and loveable and thus
experiencing the feeling of love within myself, only if I would be loved/cared
for by a member of the opposite sex, instead of realising that real love is yet
to be existent within this world, and that the love I have for myself is not to
be defined by another, but to be made real through self-investigation as
writing, self-forgiveness and self-correction.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear the
gaze of another when I am seen without my "protective hat", because
of the fear I have of seeing the same disgust that I have against myself,
through self-hate/spite and blame, when I look at myself in the mirror - within
this, I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to play the game
of comparison whenever I look at myself in the mirror, within which I would
deliberately compare my picture presentation to that of another being perceived
as superior or inferior to myself at a given moment of comparison - within
this, I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself to realise
that I play the game of comparison whenever I look at myself in the mirror, whereas
the only reason why I would feel bad about my image is because of my accepted
and allowed participation within comparison, instead of realsing myself from
such a game of the mind through stopping my participation within comparison,
and that as soon as I see/perceive myself as participating within comparison
through me experiencing highs or lows when I look at myself in the mirror, that
I immediately stop, BREATHE, realise that it is a game of the mind I no longer
want to engage in and apply self-forgiveness, self-honesty and self-corrective
application through writing or through saying it out loud until the point gets
released from within myself.
I commit myself to, through writing, self-forgiveness, self-corrective
application and self-honesty, write daily in my blog so as to become a living
example to others as what it is to be a responsible human being which acts for
the interest of what is best for all, as what is best for all is best for
everyone, Equal and One with all living beings.
If
and when I see myself moving or about to move into the mind through the “fair
of losing my hair” pattern, I stop, breathe, remind myself that it is a pattern
of me as the mind I no longer want to engage for it is not what is best for me
and what is best for all, One and Equal.
When
and as I see myself moving into the automatic personality of fear as the
thought of “I am losing my hair”, I stop, breathe, see if i have missed an
opportunity to self-correct into Oneness and Equality from which the fear
arose, if so, I forgive myself, stand up from the fear game and self-correct,
if not i stop, self-forgive my participation in fear as an automated response
to a pattern of self-abuse and bring myself back Here in and as Breath.
I
commit myself to stop myself from entertaining ideas and beliefs about fearing
losing my hair through the use of thoughts and emotions, learned ideas and
beliefs about the human condition, comparisons and games of winners and losers
to establish myself as an example of how Life could be for everyone outside of
the limited living of the Mind of illusions and back into Life as the Physical,
One and Equal for every living Being.
I
commit myself to assist and support myself through writing, self-forgiveness,
self-corrective application and breathing – to stop the fear of judgment and
stop judgment within and as me and so allow me to express myself unconditionally
for the first time.
See these blogs:
And other
Journey to Life blogs
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