I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to lie to my
"pt" because of the concern of protecting my own self-interest in not
taking the "mn" that he "pd" to me, whereas the act of me acting upon my
self-interest of not taking the "mn" is not a “bad” thing as it is me
taking a stand for what I accept and allow myself to ingest/take within
my human physical body whereas I am the authority of me in my world and
the fact of me experiencing negative experiences while taking the "mn",
such as the feeling of drowsiness/comatose/sleepiness that overcomes me
when I do take the "mn", is enough for me to know that the substance
that my "pt" has "pd" to me in order to treat my condition, is not good
for me – within which I have decided not to take the "mn" "pd" to me by
my "pt" because of those negative effects within and as me.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to experience
negative energies within and as myself when I do take the "mn", whereas I
experience the feelings/sensations of
drowsiness/sleepiness/comatose/zombie-like/confusion within myself
because of the unconscious relationship as the chemical responses that
my mind exercises through the intake of the "mn", as my mind is still
unconsciously manipulated by such substances so as to change the
chemical responses within the activities of my brain, instead of
stopping such unconscious reactions through me going into the depths of
my mind constructs and stop those reactions through the tools of
self-investigation through writing, self-forgiveness, self-honesty and
self-corrective application so as to stop myself from reacting within
the unconscious chemical reactions which generates those negative
energetic experiences that operates whenever I do take the "mn". Within
this, I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to
unconsciously/subconsciously react through and as the modified chemical
responses within and as my brain whenever I do take the "mn", whereas I
believe/perceive myself as being powerless within the fact that I
seemingly do not have control of the chemical responses/reactions that
operates within my brain as I take the "mn", since those
responses/reactions operates within the depths of my
unconscious/subconscious mind, instead of realising that I do have power
and control over the chemical reactions/responses that occurs within
and as my brain when I take the "mn", because of being the creator of
everything as myself, which includes the reactions/responses that are
operated within and as all of the different layers of mind, such as the
unconscious, subconscious and conscious mind, and that in order for me
to change/stop the chemical reactions that operates within the depths of
my unconscious and subconscious minds, that I have to work/look even
deeper within myself as what I have unconsciously accepted and allowed
myself to be and become as the mind, through the tools of
self-investigation, writing, self-forgiveness and self-corrective
application.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel uneasy
within myself when I answered the question that my "ne" asked me in orer
to know if I did/do take my "mn", whereas I felt uneasy/uncomfortable
within myself because of me lying to the "ne" through me saying that I
did/do take the "mn" while this was/is false – I forgive myself that I
have accepted and allowed myself to feel bad about myself because of
having lied to my "ne", whereas I experienced a dichotomy as a friction
within myself when I lied to my "ne" because of not being honest with
the "ne" as myself and thus, experienced myself as being “dishonoured”
because of allowing myself to lie to the "ne", even if I knew that I had
no other choice in the matter, as to tell the truth to my "ne"
regarding the fact that I do not take the "mn" would only attract more
problems for me to face with the "ml" corps/profession, as I have been
issued a "ct" "or" to take my "mn" at the end of last year, whereas if I
do not take the "mn" that I would have to face the dire consequence
that they have reserved for me, which is to go back to the "hl" for
treatment/containment, to which I do not want to happen to me. Within
this, I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to
realise that the act of me lying to my "ne" is me taking a stand for
myself through the statement that I do not need the "mn" in order to
“heal” me, as I am absolutely confident in being able to “heal” me
through my own personal application, such as through the tools of
self-investigation through writing, self-forgiveness, self-honesty and
self-corrective application, whereas the dependency to the "mn" to “heal
me” is only a “crutch” that doesn’t in fact “change/heal” me, but only
makes me “worse” within the fact that the "mn" creates a dependency to
an outside source other than myself in order to “heal/save” me, wherein
nothing outside of myself will/can save/heal me, as I am the only one
who created this condition as being bipolar and that I alone can
change/stop this condition within myself through me not accepting and/or
allowing myself to participate within energies of the mind – no "mn"
necessary/allowed as this would be me stating that I cannot change/stop
me from participating within the energies of the mind, which is
absolutely ludicrous as I am the creator of who and what I have accepted
and allowed myself to become and because of that, that I can create a
new me which isn’t addicted to energy through the tools of
self-investigation through writing, self-forgiveness, self-honesty and
self-corrective application and thus become a living example that proves
to others as myself that one can change oneself without the aid of "mn"
in order to become that which is best for all, as that which is best
for all is best for myself.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to
judge/spite/blame the "pt", the "ne" and the "ml" corps/profession for
trying/attempting to force myself to take my "mn" though coercion, as
when I was at the "hl", the "ne"s, guards and "pt" used physical
force/abuse when they first attempted to give me the "mn" that I refused
to take, whereas they physically attached me to a bed through
abusing/forcing my physical body to be in a position where I would be
powerless while they "id" within my body the ""ml"" substances that they
obliged me to take even if without my consent. Within this, I forgive
myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to hold a grudge against
the "pt"s, "ne"s and ""ml"" corps for having abused me when I was
staying at the "hl" last year, where I was held within seclusion for
days after days because of my refusal to take the "mn" that they
wanted/were adamant for me to take.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to detest the
"hl" and the "ml" corps because of the bad experiences of abuse that I
experienced when I was held “captive” within my stay at the "hl" last
year, instead of realising that I am responsible for the bad experiences
that I had at the "hl" through my simple acceptance and allowance of
such a behaviour coming from the authority figures of this world,
whereas I accept and allow myself to abuse and control those who are
subservient to my power whenever I am placed in a powerful position,
such as when I play games where I am winning, as I then accept and allow
myself to treat others as being “less than me” in exactly the same way
as what I was treated like when I was staying at the "hl". Within this, I
forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to realise
that I do the exact same thing as those who had abused me when I was in
the "hl" when I am placed in a powerful position with another, while I
maybe do not use such physical abuse as I was the “victim” of when I was
at the "hl", but using abuse nonetheless within my
expression/behaviour/non-verbal behaviour/attitude towards those who are
not in a powerful position, such as those who are “losing” within games
that I participate in with others – such as the mind games that I have
accepted and allowed myself to participate with others, wherein the
price is the energy that one can steal/gain from another within mind
games.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to perceive
myself as being a victim of the "ml" corps, because of my obligation by
"ct" "or" to take the "mn" that has been "pd" to me by my "pt", instead
of realising that I am the creator of that situation wherein because of
my acceptances and allowances in me participating in games of winners
and losers, that I thus automatically accept and allow such experiences
as those of being seen as a “victim” of another’s will and that for me
to stop myself from those acceptances and allowances within myself, that
I have to apply the tools of self-investigation through writing,
self-forgiveness, self-honesty and self-corrective application so that
to make sure that I do not accept and allow myself to participate within
such games where I feed the system of abuse as the system of the world,
and bring about a new system that stands for what is best for all, as
what is best for all is best for LIFE, Equal and One with all living
beings.
I commit myself to stop accepting and allowing myself to participate
within such games of mind polarity such as the game of power as the
gain/loss of energy that I play with other human beings, through the
realisation that as long as I accept and allow myself to participate
within the mind as games of power, that I automatically accept and allow
myself to participate within energy as the mind which abuses/misuses
substance as myself through the consumption of the physical as life for
the own sustenance/survival of myself as finite Energy – to which I am
ultimately not, as who I am is one and equal with the physical as life
eternal, wherein there is NO ENERGY which controls who I am as the
physical.
I commit myself to, through writing, self-forgiveness, self-corrective
application and self-honesty, write daily in my blog so as to become a
living example to others as what it is to be a responsible human being
which acts for the interest of what is best for all, as what is best for
all is best for everyone, Equal and One with all living beings.
If and when I see myself moving or about to move into the mind through
the reaction of “feeling powerful or a victim” pattern, I stop, breathe,
remind myself that it is a pattern of me as the mind I no longer want
to engage in for it is not what is best for me and what is best for all,
One and Equal.
When and as I see myself moving into the automatic personality of being a
victim to another’s will/or, I stop, breathe, see if i have missed an
opportunity to self-correct into Oneness and Equality from which the
personality arose, if so, I forgive myself, stand up from the
personality game and self-correct, if not i stop, self-forgive my
participation in personality as an automated response to a pattern of
self-abuse and bring myself back Here in and as Breath.
I commit myself to stop myself from entertaining ideas and beliefs about
myself as the feeling/experience of powerlessness, through the use of
thoughts and emotions, learned ideas and beliefs about the human
condition, comparisons and games of winners and losers to establish
myself as an example of how Life could be for everyone outside of the
limited living of the Mind of illusions and back into Life as the
Physical, One and Equal for every living Being.
I commit myself to assist and support myself through writing,
self-forgiveness, self-corrective application and breathing – to stop
the desires and stop the frictions/judgments/blame/spite within and as
me and so allow me to express myself unconditionally for the first time.
See these blogs:
Heaven’s Journey to Life
Creation’s Journey to Life
Earth’s Journey to Life
And other Journey to Life blogs
Desteni.org
Equalmoney.org
And check the e-bookstore as well as FREE downloads at Eqafe.com
Aucun commentaire:
Enregistrer un commentaire