jeudi 17 mai 2012

7 years journey to life: Day 8: SF on taking medication



I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I need medication in order for me to function properly within this world.



I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel drained when I take the medication that was prescribed to me by my psychiatrist in order to treat the perceive “disease” that is the bipolar disease.



I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think that I need medication in order to fix the problem that has been diagnosed within my mind through the perspective of a psychiatrist.


I forgive myself that I have acccepted and allowed myself to place the words of a psychiatrist above the words of common sense because of the perceive status of a psychiatrist as that of being a person of high opinion because of the years of studies such a person must have gone through in order to become such a praised person within the current systems of this world.





I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself to realise that the moment I place the words of a psychiatrist above those of common sense, I place the current system of the world above the system of life that stants for all life as one as equal rather than standing for the abuse of life that is the state of the current system of the world. I commit myself into taking all actions necessary through self-forgiveness, self-corrective application and writing myself to freedom, so that one day the system of life may arise from the decay of the old.




I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to place myself into a situation where I became a target for psychiatrist to drop their assessment upon me according to a limited perspective of how the brain functions and through this, having allowed myself to believe what was being told to me by the psychiatrist, which is/was that I have the bipolar disease.



I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to react to the medication that I am “forced” to take by the law and the medical system –within which I react to the medication that I intake through feelings of slumber and fogginess within and throughout my mind.



I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to realise that the feelings of slumber and fogginess is created by me as a reaction to the medication that I have to take by law, so that I may abdicate my self-responsibility further into an outside source, such as the medication represents, instead of taking self-responsibility for and as myself for what I have created as myself within and as my outside world.



I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to realise that my outside world is a reflection of my inside world within which I only reflect that which I have created as my mind consciousness system – within which I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I am my mind consciousness system through the statement that I make when I feel “sleepy”and “foggy” through the intake of the medication that is prescribed to me, rather than remaining here stable within and as myself without any reactions as effects of the medication within and upon me whatsoever.



I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to realise that I am responsible for whatever is happening in my outside world, which includes the intake of the medication and the relationship with the psychiatrist, to which I fight against and thus perpetuate this inner fight outward within the outside physical reality because of not having realised that my outside world is a direct reflection of my inner world – within which I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to realise that in order for me to change the outside world, I must first change my inside world through self-forgiveness and self-corrective application so that I may become a living, breathing example for all living beings so that each one may eventually become free as all as one as equal as life.



I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to realise that I am supporting the Abuse towards life when I take medication because of it having first been tested on animals against their will and frequently causing irreparable harm to the animals, within which I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to become “bipolar” within my nature so as to continue on blindly supporting such abuse as in the medication industry rather than stop the abuse through me stopping taking on the medication (to which I want to but can’t for the moment because of the court order) and stopping my participation within the system of abuse so as to birth myself as life as the physical, all as one as equal.



I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to “want to kill myself” because of being “forced” to take the medication against my will and thereby having thought, for a moment, of killing myself as the only solution to the problem that arose from taking the medication within which I felt abused through the modification that the medication generated in my body/behaviour, frequently leaving me depressed because of the changes that the medication generated within my communication and motor skills.




If and when I see myself moving or about to move into the mind through the "fear of being medicated" patter, I stop, breathe, remind myself that it is a pattern of me as the mind I no longer want to engage for it is not what is best for me and what is best for all, One and Equal.





When and as I see myself moving into the automatic personality of shame of "I must take medication", I stop, breathe, see if i have missed an opportunity to self-correct into Oneness and Equality from which the shame arose, if so, I forgive myself, stand up from the shame and self-correct, if not i stop, self-forgive my participation in shame as an automated response to a pattern of self-abuse and bring myself back Here in and as Breath.





I commit myself to stop myself from entertaining ideas and beliefs about "having to take medication" and from judging myself and others as "being more or less than me", through the use of thoughts and emotions, ideas and beliefs, comparisons and games of winners and losers to establish myself as an example of how Life could be for everyone outside of the limited living of the Mind of illusions and back into Life as the Physical, One and Equal for every living Being.

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